I Want You Back By My Side .

Current Mood Crying , Tearing .
Current Music It's Not Goodbye .

Pictures speaks a thousand words .



I'm blogging today for a reason .
I want to blog all my feelings out .


To GordonChenWeinian :
Yes , I'm blogging because I want to write all my feelings out .
I'm afraid to tell you all these .
& Everytime I msg you , you don't reply .
So I'll just write out all in here .

Boy , remember 11o4o9 , 139 am ?
That's the day since we're together .
I'll never forget this date , because it meant so much to me .
Everytime when you agreed to meet me , I'll be so damn happy .
I won't forget those sweetest hugs , those sweetest kisses you gave me .
It meant so much to me . You're just so sweet .
People says that we're so cute & sweet .
I'll be so damn happy whenever I hear that .
Whenever I'm with you , I feel safe & secure .
You always gave me those cute & sweet smiles that will melt my heart .
Cute until I wanna pinch your cheeks .
Since the day that you've sent me that msg , I cried outside Watsons' .
Ever since that day , I've been crying for you nonstop .
I don't care if my eyes hurts , I just want you by my side .
That day , when I'm in the chalet , you sent me that msg ,
I open the msg & read it . At first I thought that you sent me a sweet one ,
who know it was so heartbreaking , it was killing me inside out .
I cried . I cried from 12 to around 3 plus .
It might be exaggerating but it's true .
I don't know if you believe it or not , but I felt like dying at that moment .
I didn't know what to do , my mind was blank . Total blank ...
Sisters & brothers came & consoled me .
But all I do is to cry , & not even bothering about them .
I stood outside for awhile , until EdwinBrother came out too .
He talked to me . But no , I won't give up .
Our relationship was only 2 weeks , many people say it'll be easy .
But for me , no . I've gave my whole heart to you .
How possibly will I be able to give you up just like that ?
Sisters came outside , gathering around me .
They told me not to cry anymore .
Yeahs , I sent you that msg .
& You told me that we'll have another chance .
You said everything will have a chance . I agree with that too .
EdwinBrother told me that you need time to think .
I understand how you're feeling . Of course you need time .
Because it was long since you've a girlfriend .
All I can do now is to stood by you , always be there for you .
Showing you more love , letting you feel it .
Making you understand how important you are to me .
& Grab the chance with you , win you back to be mine once again .
Boy , I guessed you never knew what I did for you ...
Everytime when we wanna meet , I'll go & meet you .
Everytime when I call you , you're busy . & I'll wait for your call .
Everytime when I msg you , you won't reply , but I'll still wait for it .
Every night , when I call you , you say you'll call me later .
I will stood on my bed & wait for it .
Sometimes you'll not call until it's 1 or 2 plus in the night .
I fall asleep while waiting , but still , I'll wakeups just for your call .
Even if it was just 1o to 15 minutes conversation with you , it's still worthed .
I scribble around my foolscap everyday .
With your name on it . I draw & write for you .

Remember yesterday ? When we talked on the phone ?
We kept quiet for quite sometime .
I know you was watching your teevee programme , so I just kept quiet .
I don't want to disturb you , or let you find me irritating .
But did you know that when I heard your voice , I cried ?
I cried silently & I didn't want you to know .
How badly I wanted to call you " Baby " on the phone .
How badly I wanted you to hug me , or kiss me .
How badly I wanted you to be by my side , even if it's just for awhile .
After we hung up , I stood on my bed & cried .
Do you even know that ?

I missed your hugs , your kisses .
I missed the way we always kp each other .
I missed the way you smiled at me .
I missed the way you called me " Baby " .
I missed the way I called you " Baby " , & you " hmms " me .
I missed the way we joked with each other .
I missed the way we laughed with each other .
I missed the way you fed me with your favourite Eclipse .
I missed the days you sent me home .
I missed the days you sayang-ed my head .
I missed the days we talked on the phone .
I simply just missed your everything .
& Of course , Imissyou .

I've met you today . But this time , it was different .
You came down all the way from Pasir ris to Sengkang .
You've never came so far just to meet me before .
But sorry , I was emoing all the way .
I cried infront of you , because I couldn't control anymore .
You waited for the bus with me .
I asked you to go first , but you insist .
& Gave me some excuses to stay ,
which made me laughed when I don't even want to smile .
When my bus came , you open your hands wide for me to hug .
I hugged you , & I hope that time would stop .
But I just hugged you & left ...
I didn't even turned back to take a glance at you .
Because I was afraid that I'll run back & hugged you .
I was afraid that I'll cry again .
& When I was in the bus , I cried again .
I really don't know what to do anymore boy .

I know you won't be reading this .
Because I don't know if you ever came to my blog before .
But boy , I just want to tell you that , Iloveyou .
Imissyou , Ineedyou , Iwantyou , & most of all , ILOVEYOU .
I want you to be back by my side once again ...

I just want that chance from you .
Just that one chance from you & I'll prove it to you .
I'll prove it to you by actions that Iloveyou .
11o4o9 , 139 am , I hope this love will never end .
I only want to be GordonChen's & no one else .

I admit I wrote all of these with tears :) .
Boy , I miss & love your everything .